You know that evil guy down the street? The one dad’s always telling you to avoid? The one dad says won’t simply beat you, but will torture you for eternity if given the chance?

So anyway, dad was casually chatting with him one day and he made a bet about your loyalty. Remember that week when all your stuff was tossed out, all your pets died, and all your friends disappeared? And shit just kept getting worse and worse no matter how much you suffered? Yeah. Your dad did that. He did all of that just to prove a point to that “evil” guy. Totally the actions of somebody with your best interests at heart.

Now go tell him you still love him so the evil neighbor doesn’t take you away forever.