For the past few years I’ve been keeping my hair short but recently I decided to start growing it out. I haven’t had actually long hair in years and I completely forgot how much of a pain in the ass growing your hair out is, especially when it’s just long enough to get in your way but not long enough to do anything with. All of this isn’t even getting into the dysphoria aspect. I just want to have an androgynous hairstyle that’s long but I really don’t know what to aim for and how to avoid it being too fem/too masc. Does anyone have any tips? Any suggestions for what to tell/show to my friend who’s a stylist and cuts my hair? My hair is very straight and kind of a mullet currently. Just at my eyes in the front and down to the base of my neck in the back, the sides go a little past my jaw. I also have an undercut. My goal is to be androgynous and at least try to avoid the constant misgendering I get from trans and cis people alike.
A lot of the time, coming in with visual examples to help guide the conversation will help.
Like, if you know cosmetology terminology, just going that route is great, but even with my best friend teaching it, I don’t have enough grasp to pull it off. So find visuals. From what my friend has said, it’s going to go a lot smoother than just using words even if you do have some jargon under your belt.
It’s also important, imo, to realize that unless you just let it stay natural, you’ll be changing styles a few times as you progress from shoulder length to properly long hair. Not just because it’ll frame your face different, but because the weight of the hair changes how it hangs and flows.
I’ve had long hair since I was 12ish, and until my balding progressed far enough that my only style option was skullet, I tried all kinds of styles. I agree with my friend (who, unfortunately, didn’t get into the field until after my ass went bald heavily); the best cuts I ever had were when I took visuals in and used them as a framework for figuring out what I wanted on my head shape with my face.
If it helps, I did find that I looked more androgynous (despite being a beefy dude with a beard) with more layered or feathered styles. It kinda took the harder edges of my features and softened them a tad. Since I have a generally round face and head, it also lengthened my face more than I had thought just a hairstyle could. So, I reckon if my features could be softened that much, it might be a good starting place to look for visuals of androgynous vibes.
Something like that might be a decent starting point since you haven’t reached shoulder length yet.
But it really comes down to how it fits your face, so pics are only a starting point for a good stylist to work from